Cape Cod or Cancun? Vacation Spots to Suit Every Political Type

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Republican who wants to hide their wealth

Adirondack Mountains, N.Y.

If you’re looking to downplay your wealth when you travel, head straight to the Adirondack Mountains. Aside from being home to the highest summits in New York state, it’s also a great place for a stealth-mode vacation: Just ask Clarence Thomas. Shaded by acres of old-growth forests, you’ll be able to hide from the prying eyes of the press. Harlan Crow’s private resort is off-limits (unless you’re a Supreme Court justice), but there are plenty of luxury lodges for you to choose from.

Right-wing influencer on Truth Social

Doral, Fla.

It’s no secret that Miami’s beaches are a beautiful backdrop for any Instagram pic. But if you’re a MAGA influencer looking to boost your status on Truth Social, head straight to the lobby of Trump’s golf resort in Doral. Where else would you be able to take selfies with people adjacent to Trump World and make yourself look like an insider too? You might not find as many blockbuster names as are hanging out in Mar-a-Lago, but at least it’s cheaper than a pricey yearlong membership there.

Dem politician trying to butter up blue-collar, middle-class voters

Traverse City, Mich.

If you’re trying to convince voters that you’re not an establishment politician, what better way to connect with them than by participating in America’s favorite pastime? (Hint: that would be fishing.) Show the masses that you’re just like them by knocking back a beer while waiting for the next big catch. Traverse City, which sits next to Lake Michigan, is a fishing hot spot in the summer with plenty of salmon and steelhead to go around. Don’t forget to post a picture with your catch at the end of your trip. Maintain your enviro cred by practicing catch and release.

Recently unemployed Ron DeSantis staffers shopping for a new gig

Myrtle Beach, S.C.

Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis’ presidential campaign is going through a major makeover right now, and if you’re one of the unlucky souls who got laid off, now is the time for a restart. You can get some rest and relaxation while pondering your future by scoping out South Carolina, home to rising star Sen. Tim Scott and former Gov. Nikki Haley. Myrtle Beach boasts a 60-mile stretch of beautiful sandy beaches, and as you read America, a Redemption Story by Scott in the sun (or Haley’s own bio, Can’t Is Not an Option), begin to think of ways to use your South Carolina vacation as leverage to join another potentially more viable campaign.

The love it and leave it liberal

Whistler, Canada

We heard it after 2016, again in 2020 and will likely be hearing it in 2024 too. If you’re one of those Democrats who has been threatening to relocate in the case of a second Trump victory, make this the year you scope out a new home. Test out Canada, our friendly neighbor, by visiting Whistler — a lush and quaint town that provides plenty of hiking, mountain biking and canoeing in the summer. Make a side trip to the Brackendale Eagles Park where our Canadian friends have even created a haven for our national symbol, the bald eagle. You might love it so much that you’ll apply for a visa as soon as you’re back.

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